I may have jinxed us

 Yesterday was absolutely beautiful in our slice of Ohio, so we tried to take advantage of the sunshine and pleasant temps. Dada wanted to remove at least parts of a spindly tree which leaned some branches against Thing Two’s bedroom windows and roof. Brush pick-up happens this month and next, so we were dragging branches to the curb, using the tractor to tote bigger log sections towards the fire pit area, and so forth.

Thing Three decided to ride his bike a few minutes and headed west to investigate the bridge being replaced at the end of our street whilst I headed east for another armload of branches to drag- it was good exercise for opening up my chest area where some of the adhesions are- so we parted ways.

In maybe forty-five seconds, I heard a Charlie Brown sort of “AAAAAUGH!” I turn to see one of Thing Three’s Crocs in the middle of the street and him under his bike.

The heck?! Was there a stampede of invisible wildebeest or what? There is no traffic because our road is closed due to the bridge being out on the west end. What happened?!

It turns out that he’d been slaloming along and skidded on a slippery part, got dumped off with the bike on top of him, and popped his head through the triangle of the bike frame. He got himself righted and walked the bike back, assessing as he comes. The Croc-less foot has three nickel to quarter sized abrasions, one on his right elbow, a silver dollar sized one on his lower back, a few smaller abrasions in various places, but his right wrist was under the bike when he landed.

It hurts to rotate in any direction and to touch thumb to fingers. If you guessed “scaphoid fracture” then give yourself a round of applause because that’s exactly what the X-rays revealed. Apparently it’s a small wrist bone which supports other small wrist bones, already has a sluggish blood supply, and takes a long while to heal. You know, exactly the kind of injury a 16-year-old who plays the saxophone is going to be first in line to sign up for.

He’s in his temporary cast but will see the good folks over at ortho later this week and they’ll see what’s what. He is allowed Tylenol or Motrin, should elevate it when he can, and won’t be allowed to lift much of anything for awhile with that side. Fortunately, he writes lefty and there was no head-bonking during the crash.

I had visions of Calvin’s killer bike from the Calvin & Hobbes comic strip- that’s exactly what it looked like to see the bike pounced on top of him, gloating!

That’s what I get for saying we are pretty much fine and dandy over here! 

Another true school short story

 My coworker: Okay, boys and girls, we are going to-

Five year old: Did you forget all our names?

A funny from Thing Two

 Whilst he was cleaning out gutters, I asked Thing Two to please check the dryer vent as well. Good thing he did, as there were actual twigs in there amongst dryer fuzz and now it shuts correctly. However, upon opening it, he coughed and sputtered and we heard, 

"Ack! I've been spored!"

Running through the wringer of back-to-school

Hi! I feel like it's been awhile. Probably because life got nuts once school restarted. While our preschool students have a delayed and slower start than everyone else, the prep work and meetings bled straight into general craziness. We've now had weeks of short weeks, and are finishing our second entire school week. Let me tell you, the kids aren't the only ones who are tiiiiiiiiired. I don't know how you full time people do it, I really don't. Pat yourselves on the back. You're amazing.

We noticed last year when we did the Winter Olympics with the preK crowd that their gross motor skills got a great workout and that by having them MOVE earlier in the morning seemed to lead to better days overall, especially for the wiggliest ones of the group. With that in mind, we decided to form smaller groups and rotate through stations throughout our morning, with gross motor being one of those segments. I've been having a ball dreaming up games with pool noodles and bandanas and sidewalk chalk. So far, we've made it through the letters A and B, and the numbers 1 and 2 along with colors and some shapes. It's been interesting to see what returning students retained (or didn't) over the summer and what the brand new kiddos know. This week was the letter B, so we did lots of balancing and bouncing, which worked well with using 1 foot or 2 feet, so we got both letters AND number review in there as we moved our bodies. I am either going to be in the best shape of my life or collapse completely after doing 4 sections of exercises all the time, hahaha!

Healthwise, my oncologist's office called to let me know that my circulating tumor cell results came back negative, which is a good thing! She also gave the all-clear for my PT gals and chiropractor to do whatever they need to do to get me moving. The chiropractor crunched my neck two weeks ago so I can look over both shoulders again and it has been wonderful! Now my PT crew can retry some cupping and dry needling, which causes tiny tears in the upper levels of your musculature under your skin so the body increases blood flow to try to mend what it sees as "new" damage. In my case, it should also get the lymph system moving better as well, so the hope is that once the layers closest to the skin start becoming more pliable that we can then dig deeper and address the adhesions and the ridiculous tightness that has gummed up the works for months. We'd been waiting on clearance from my vascular person but she's been on leave and the appointment keeps getting pushed back... 

Anyway, it's been 8 years yesterday since my double mastectomy, so thanks for being along for the ride. Some of you have been reading these crazy thoughts in my head for YEARS!

Football season is upon us, so the marching band is in full swing, which makes Thing Three happy. We've won two games and lost three, so it is what it is. These next three games are away and the last two will be back at home. 

Job hunting is ... going?... for Thing Two. It sounds like there are places hiring so now we play the waiting to hear back from applications game.

Thing One hasn't blown away yet to my knowledge but has come close... weather in OBX is a little volatile this week. Someone needs to remind the wind of the line in a kids' song, "don't bring the sand home from the beach. Don't. Don't. Don't!"

Dada's out volunteering for work today, so I'm glad he's getting some sunshine and fresh air today- it's gorgeous! Our preK crew was out quite awhile and we were justifying it because A) we're getting Vitamin D and fresh air to combat the germs that are already starting to spread, B) it's been gray and damp so many days already that even when the kids are home they're not playing outside, and C) to quote George R.R. Martin's Game of Thrones epic, "Winter is coming." Or, as my coworker tells the kids, "go blow the stink off!" The kids peel out of the building, cackling.

As usual, my phone is overloaded with photos, and I haven't attempted to post any for awhile, so maybe this weekend I will have a chance. We have a busy day tomorrow filled with fun things, next week I hope to paint all the trim in the basement during the evenings since I don't have a million appointments now like I have lately, and then get the basement somewhat back together for people to use. We have work to do in every single room- the house is a legit disaster zone because we've had extra stuff most evenings for the last two weeks*- so I plan to start in the kitchen tonight and spread out from there.

*One day last week I staggered through the front door like a typical teacher- backpack on, arms full, water bottle (which I just realized I left at school all weekend today, oops) precariously perched, stuff in both hands, kicking the door shut behind me and was greeted with, 

"Hey Mom, I threw out my retainer today...."

While it wasn't at all what I said in the moment, eventually I did remember a life lesson from the Beatles, "la la la la, life gooooooes on...."

Have a great weekend!

True stories

 Four year old, examining my photo ID/ nametag from last year with my buzzed hair: Is that your grandma?

Me: …..

Different four year old, playing with playdoh: This is a cookie.

Me: Ooh, what kind of cookie?

Him: Mine.

Coffee on my couch

To say that my great-grandmother’s end table residing at the left end of our couch is loaded would be a generous understatement. The faithful little table is overrun. However, there are three coasters on it in varying degrees of… coverage… and I do use them religiously. 

This morning, I got myself situated into my lymphedema pump which consists of a vest and a sleeve which zips down past my right and dominant hand. It has three several feet-long hoses which connect to an air compressor, and it runs three programs of varying lengths. Today, I selected the shortest, a half hour, and once I was all zipped up, I settled into my spot on the couch and reached for my fresh mug of coffee. 

It’s about 5:35 in the morning, dark outside, quiet inside. I have one, maybe two glorious sips after managing, with my left hand, to maneuver the mug so I could hold it by the handle without disturbing anything else on my Jenga game of a coffee table, even as I thought, “I’ve gotta clean that over Labor Day weekend.”

One sip, two sips max, when a spider, you guys, a fast, black, striped spider scurries down my right leg!

Thankfully, I’m not a screamer- I’m more like Nala from The Lion King, “I laugh in the face of danger, hahahahaaaaa!”- but let me tell you, there went sips three, four, five, six, seven, eight, and nine as I swept and swatted with my pump-encumbered right arm whilst my mug jiggled in my left hand!

And now I need to wash the couch cover after I’ve typed this on my phone with one finger because my right arm is still in the pump sleeve.

AND, do you believe that I saw that lecherously leering with all 8 eyes little creep somehow end up BEHIND me and scuttling over the back of the couch?! “I dunno where he go-ed” as my kids would say, but now I’m awake, and so is the couch thanks to its caffeine baptism, but miraculously the end table is unscathed!

May your day be only full of GOOD surprises…

And another thing

 It smelled like skunk when we stepped outside this morning, but I’m flummoxed as to why it smelled like Doritos at the bus stop. What is going on today?!

A fruit fly on top and grounds on the bottom

 I dunno how your hump day elixir of magic beans turned out, but I found a drowned fruit fly floating in mine. Once I fished the carcass out and savored my sips, I got to the bottom of my cute little mug of creamy deliciousness where I had grounds at the bottom. Supposedly you can tell futures from tea leaves… what are my coffee bean grounds predicting, I wonder?