Hiya and happy almost holidays! The title is something my Nana used to say when asked how she was doing. I felt it was fitting to sum up how I'm functioning these days.
For those of you who are panicking because you're not ready, take a deep breath and know that we are right there with you. For those of you who keep getting more things tossed at you in this game called life, take another breath and be still a moment. You're allowed. There is hard stuff happening, and you, too, are not alone. For those of you experiencing a very Blue Christmas, big hugs from us, and more deep breaths, and just do what you can. And if you can't, that is okay, too. Just be. Just breathe. Please know you're loved.
I had the last of the AC part of chemo on Tuesday last week and you guys must have been praying hard, because I was expecting next-door-to-end-of-the-world awfulness but experienced next-door-to-exhaustion instead. Thank you! The nausea has not been fun, but it has been manageable, and I'm still taking as many naps as possible, which helps. The brain fog is real; I've caught myself making out multiple Christmas cards to the same person, so if you end up with three or end up with none- it's my fault either way. Sorry. Next year will be better. Doing a lot of facepalming over here. But, as my Nana said, "I'm doin'."
The next step will be weekly infusions of Taxol for all of the next three months. Supposedly that will be easier on my system and my doc thinks I will handle that well. The new wrinkle will be hands and feet neuropathy, which I'm a bit nervous about as I've been fortunate to never have to deal with that yet... guess we'll see how it goes. Doc said if it's terrible they can dial back the dose of Taxol, but I want this round of cancer to be the last ever round of cancer so I kinda don't want to inhibit any of the meds... no sense stressing over it. It'll be what it'll be. We will figure it out.
Since that doesn't start until January, I have the rest of this month to recover, gain weight I mean "enjoy Christmas goodies", attempt to finish my cards before Christmas, get my far and wide ranging ducks back in a row, take the boys to the dentist for their appointment, enjoy time with loved ones, hopefully bake some and take more naps. I am very much enjoying not waiting at the bus stop while the temps are in the teens, but I'm sure there will be plenty of that in 2025.
Don't exhaust yourselves this season chasing down the Stuff or trying to do All The Things. Make the time for the people and activities that fill your spirit back up, and know that you're loved more than you realize. Be good to yourself! You are worth it!
Drink water and wash your hands. The germs are legion!
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