Wednesday, December 04, 2019

Tales from The Ridiculous

School mornings continue around here about as you'd expect. I had to hold back The Fist of Death from Dilbert this morning when I commented to Liam that he needed to improve on his time management skills.

"It's just mornings. I'm pretty good at it."

Hooooooold me back! He was serious! He genuinely believes that he is good at time management.

Please excuse me while I go bang my head against the first hard surface I can find.

***

I made the mistake of leaving the "Bath and Whatever" (as Uncle Jeff calls Bed, Bath, and Beyond) catalog on the kitchen table and as any distraction is a good distraction, Liam dove for it. He found "toilet golf" and "toilet fishing" and declared them to be good ideas. I'm not even kidding. These are real things one can actually purchase. Check your catalogs, people. Thing1 and I shook our heads ruefully that anyone anywhere would think that more games to be played in the bathroom could possibly be a good idea. Her money is on single guys. I mimed holding someone by the shirt and punching them repeatedly in the face.

Clearly I'll have to circle back and have a discussion on how toilet anything can not be conducive to any kind of time management... 

***

The firstborn announced this morning, "I have a great idea! We should make pepperoni for dogs and call it pupperoni!"

Totally bursted that bubble: "They already make that."

"Oh NOOOOOO!" Giggles ensued from both parties.

***
Then the firstborn knocked authoritatively on the bathroom door to chivvy Thing3 along. 

Startled, he calls "what!?" and then opens the door.

All the way downstairs I hear, "why are you naked!?"

More giggles. And blindness.

Happy Hump Day, everyone...

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