So this is all Mike’s fault. Or at least I blame him for the power of suggestion. That’s more accurate. He mentioned the word “slushee” the other day and because I haven’t had one in so very long, the suggestion became an irresistible itch. I don’t often sneak out and get myself a treat. It’s much more likely that I’ll “go be bad” with a partner in crime. But today I did a bunch of outside work and man, it’s hot. So I figured, “eh, I’ll grab a slushee from the gas station between here and the library.”
I pull into the parking lot and reasoned that I may as well use the restroom first. Good thing my mother and my Nana had taught me to always check to see if there was toilet paper before doing my business, because sure enough, both rolls were empty.
I wash my hands anyway, as I’d been working outside and was dirtier than I looked. No way to wash off my face unless I wanted to stick it under the knock-you-into-the-next-county hand dryers, which I love, by the way, so I figured I was as good as I could be. I headed out, reported the paucity of TP in the women’s room and was thanked by the cashier who promptly headed in with two humongous rolls, and I found the slushee contraptions.
After assessing the cups (small to trough sizes) and the price list, I figure a small Coke slushee should be just about right. I snag the smallest insulated cup I see, position it under the Coke spigot, turn the handle, and nothing happens. Hmm. I turn the handle the opposite direction. Still nothing. I lift the handle. Surely that will work. Nada. Have I mentioned it’s been a really long time since I’ve had a slushee? So long that I’m clearly inept.
Some poor innocent bystander comes out of the men’s restroom and I accost him. “Do you know how to work these things? Am I doing something wrong?” He looks surprised, assesses the situation and remarks, “usually they’re spinning. You should be able to just pull up on the handle.” I try it again and we both watch nothing pour into my cup. He lifts the handle of the pina colada kind next to the Coke and a jet immediately squirts into the tray.
By now the cashier is on her return trip to the register and I pivot to ask her. “Can you help me with this? Am I doing something wrong or are all of these not working?” She explains that they’d had a power outage and while power has been restored, they haven’t spun yet.
Drat!
So off I go to the library, having had no potty break and no slushee. Alas.
After deleting a bajillion old emails and being too distracted by my lack of a cool treat (I have water in the car- that doesn’t count), I log out and walk a block to the gas station down the street from the library.
THEY have TP AND their slushee machines are spinning. Okay, select cup, select Coke (one of the few that looked like it was working, thank you, God, woohoo, a slushee!) Now a lid. Small looks about right. Nope. Okay, medium in a dome. Nope. Okay, let’s try this flat one. Not quite, but oh well. Slap it on there and none of the slushee squishes out so we’re good. Next, straw. Pocket says “spoon straws”, perfect. Grab, pay, out the door, lid blows off in the parking lot so I grab it and laugh, and my straw is just a regular long straw with no spoon on the end but is in my favorite color so I consider it a win.
Next time I’m getting a trough.
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